rxelyn: (epic fail)
Just a little more and the moon will be full, but the stream of moonlight that enters my room is really pretty, since I'm typing this in the dark, and the only thing illuminated would be the laptop screen and that beam of moonlight from way above. (my mother has been nagging at me to go to sleep, so yeah.)

I'm feeling waaay energetic, I think it sort of has to do with the alcohol that I downed this afternoon, mango and gin mixed, taste damn brilliant, and coupled with bittersweet chocolate and good, loud music... hmm. I think my mother would have killed me if she knew that our neighbor has snuck me alcohol, hoho.)

Anyway, my eldest brother is back from Taiwan! And he gave me two thumbdrives, like, finally! :D And a Domo-kun handphone holder! It's so cute! Haha, yes, I like Domo-kun because it looks so... straightforward. Lol.

The past few days were spent not on studying. I tried. But I fell asleep halfway. And only woke up to watch K.O3an guo. I know. I suck. And I want to watch Blood: The Last Vampire. And I also have been rewatching Samurai Champloo and overdosing on Atobe/Jiroh fanfic. x.x I am so dead for the upcoming exams... *headdesk*
rxelyn: (FU)
I'm fucking sleepy as hell. I can feel the tiredness in my eyes, but I just can't bloody fall asleep. I hate this in-between feeling, like stuck in limbo because your mind is still working at like a fast pace whereas your body is shutting down. I'm making so many typos, it's not funny and there a dull ache in my head that I'm really tempted to head desk just to replace the pain. DDDD:

I tried reading, drinking water, browsing random sites, contemplated taking sleeping pills/prescribed medicine, listened to soothing music. Nothing worked and I'm still wide awake, at least mentally. It's not that I want to sleep at absurd times, like 3 or 4 in the morning, but my body refuses to allow me rest.
rxelyn: (meaningless)
Atiqah wants me to write something emo for her school thing. So... let's see if the muse decides to cooperate today while high on bitter medicine.

Anyway, $44.40 on my medical bill. (... which madde me think of TH; my mind is so lame sometimes) Such ominous words.

If I was curt or ignoring you today, I didn't mean it, just that it physically hurt to talk. I think I haven't spoken about 10 sentences today, haha. Not that I'm a regular chatterbox, but still. Went off earlier than expected because I really couldn't take it anymore. Pounding head, closed up throat. Gah. And there were stuff that I wanted to talk about, even if just to let out the busy voices in the head.

Okay, this may sound weird or what, but there's a part of me that enjoys being sick. No, it's not because of priviledges like not needing to do chores and such, it's that, when I'm sick, I'm hypersensitive to everything, it's like, (excuse the poor analogy) listening to a piece of music and suddenly you don't just focus on the melody or the lead singer's voice. Instead, you start noticing the guitar riffs, the bass lines, the way the drums seem to be beating in time to your internal clock or what. Like, opening up in a spiritual way? Gee, I'm terrific at explaining things.

And I don't know if it's just me being in an emotional state, but I felt my heart cringe while reading this . It's slash, so homophobes might want to keep away. Though I don't know why you're reading my LJ if you're homophobic in the first place.


pain.

Jul. 8th, 2008 07:31 pm
rxelyn: (meaningless)
...

great pain.

can't even speak, it's like my throat is closing up from the pain.

this is the worst attack of the cramps.

omg, what's wrong with me?!
generally have a higher tolerance for pain, but am seriously unused to cramps.



no mood to do anything but lie in my bed and hug my stomach.
rxelyn: (meaningless)
Hey, Faza, still recognize the joke in the title?

I'm cleaning up my room and... yes, I suspect that all I will get in return is a slow and tormenting death by said dust bunnies. Except that they aren't exactly bunnies anymore... more like... dust clumped together in a vaguely Godzilla shape. *dies*

Dust and I used to have a pretty good working relationship; don't invade into my space aka anywhere that I can visibly see, I will ignore. But instead of upholding to our deal, it has been secretly conspiring against me!!! DDDDD: AKIRA SHOCK! lol.

I'm weird, I guess, but I get these... cleaning urges like every three or four times a year on the most random of days and always late at night. Yeah, I start picking up all the stupid school papers from school, rifle through them, chuckle/wince/roll my eyes at my own original writings/fanfiction. Then I start throwing out papers and before I even finish sorting through the damned papers, I move on to other things, which worsens the fricking situation. Gods. >.> Just kill me now before I'm mauled to death by dust. x.x And I can't freaking sleep too, cos I'm sort of too hyped up to fall asleep... and it's just too messy to sleep! What if I roll around in my sleep and fall off my bed?! I don't wanna land in a pile of papers! Damn, I need to go shopping for furniture, seriously, too much books and nowhere to arrange them! I'm pretty anal when it comes to things that I like, and I want to have a gorgeous bookshelf where I can goddamn alphabetize the books and cds and comics etc.

Now I'm mostly stumped as to put what where... damn, where's a SWAT team when you need one?

WTF?!

Jun. 3rd, 2008 05:54 pm
rxelyn: (eyesore)
Okay, so I was looking for new piano scores to download and use as sight reading practices, when I stumbled upon this one very stupid thing: VISTA CANNOT FUCKING OPEN .GIF FILES! It's like WTF?! It's also freaking annoying when I have to open it in internet explorer because I use firefox and hate explorer. Wow, way to fucking go, microsoft. So bloody damned screwed up.

And while Finale Notepad is damn useful (because it also plays the composition at the same time) the school computers do not support the extension... so I can't print them in school, which is the only place where I can print things without feeling guilty. So troublesome~

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